you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
