I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Randomize