windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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