apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Randomize
