Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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