I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
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