hell yes lets make some ravioli
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I can't turn off my feet"
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Randomize
