i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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