I feel like abortions should bother me more
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
