If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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