my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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