Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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