btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
