Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Randomize
