remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
