lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
