Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Panties = found
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
