PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
