Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
