I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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