Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
