Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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