It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
