I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
