I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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