My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
well, you know. whores of a feather.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
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