i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
