In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
