i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize
