AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
