i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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