thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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