The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
