But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
he's gonorrhea incarnate
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Randomize
