How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
