WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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