Whod you bang
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
