She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
