Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I'm like, not good at living.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
