Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I'm bleeding and have questions
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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