my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
cat food counts as protein by the way
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize
