dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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