i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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