I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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