kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
