i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
