Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Randomize
