last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
