4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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