found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
3pm strippers are depressing
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
